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Sexy Beer-Inspired Gear for Thirsty Minds

Beer Drinker Apparel for Those Who Like Their Shirts Cold and Their Pints Wet
See What’s On Tap Gift a Shirt!

Your Love for Beer is No Longer Hard to Swallow

At Cochrane Balz Brewing, we know beer isn’t just a drink—it’s foreplay for great stories. We’re here to dress you in beer lover apparel that’s unapologetically sexy, slightly inappropriate, and just as off-color as your sense of humor.

Our beer-inspired clothing is designed for those who live life one sip (and snarky comment) at a time. Whether you’re pounding beers at a summer barbecue or warming up on a chilly pub night, we’ve got the gear to keep your wardrobe as full as your stein.

Good Times, Great Beers, Better Shirts

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Get a Taste of Our Labels: Bold, Funny, and Just a Little Dirty

Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label
Balz Label

This Week’s Featured Drafts — Fresh Gear That Hits Harder Than Your First Round on an empty stomach

Why settle for the same boring brews when you can try something a little more... suggestive? Our weekly featured drafts deliver bold designs and cheeky laughs that’ll have you double-fisting T-shirts and tank tops like it’s last call.

Beer Drinking Shirts:

Beer Drinking Shirts:

These witty designs keep you cool, casual, and confidently inappropriate

Shop The Drafts
Tank Tops:

Tank Tops:

Keep it light, loose, and a little naughty with tank tops perfect for steamy summer nights filled with jugs… of beer.

Shop The Drafts
Hoodies:

Hoodies:

Warm, soft, and attention-grabbing—like the perfect cuddle buddy. Wrap yourself in style that’s impossible to resist.

Shop The Drafts

Welcome to Enablers

Because life’s better when you’re sharing a cold one and a dirty joke. This is where our fun-loving beer lovers show off their Cochrane Balz gear in pubs, at festivals, and even while committing unspeakable acts like karaoke.

Tag Your Cochrane Balz Moments: Share your pics with #TheEnablersClub and join our cheeky, off-color crew. Who knows? You might land on our page—and in some stranger’s spank bank.

Crack Open the Good Times

The Perfect Gift for Beer Lovers – Because Everyone Wants Our Cochrane Balz on Their Chest

Need a gift for someone who loves beer almost as much as they love a good laugh? Our beer drinker apparel isn’t just for you – it’s the perfect gift for birthdays, Father’s Day, or any day you want to make someone smile. Each design is crafted with humor, perfect for the beer-loving friend who doesn’t take life too seriously.

Any day can be a special day with the right gift:

Any day can be a special day with the right gift:

  • Father’s Day (because we are the dirty dad joke experts)
  • Birthdays (no candles on the beer, but close enough)
  • Christmas (if “Ho Ho Hop” isn’t a thing yet, it is now)
  • Valentine’s Day & Anniversaries: Forget flowers—put our Cochrane Balz on their chest instead.
  • And for those times you just want to say, “Here’s to you!”

Browse Gift Ideas
Birthday must-haves

Birthday must-haves

Beer-inspired clothing that’ll be the hit of the party.

Browse Gift Ideas
Anytime gifts

Anytime gifts

Get them something they’ll actually want to wear.

Browse Gift Ideas

What Our Fans Say About Our Cochrane Balz

We could stroke our own ego, but that’s not nearly as fun as having others do it for us. See what your fellow beer lovers think about our sexy beer drinker apparel. Spoiler: They love it almost as much as a cold pint and a bad decision.

The shirt is great and communication was excellent.

TIP: They say they don't make beer but I heard if you go out front and yell "I want your coch and balz" repeatedly, they will give you one to shut up.

Derek H.

You are my new hands-down favourite non-producing local brewery business on the planet.

Also, likely the only one.

But still.

Couldn't love this more

Ellen C.

We never want to wear anything else! I will be ordering for my posse!!!

Jolene A.

Who would have thought that somebody would build a business based on a business that doesn't exist.Crazy!They seem to be pulling it off though!Hilarious designs, great quality, great customer service, family-owned and operated.

Norman K.

Amazing customer service and quality products! Will be purchasing items for the whole family.

Meghan D.

Hilarious concept, love the designs, have already bought a half dozen shirts for family and friends. They are a big hit. Great customer service and quality shirts!

Kevin S.

Truly the greatest brewery to never exist. Merch is absolutely phenomenal quality and has never failed as a gift to family, friends, or myself. Certainly will be buying more soon!

Adam L.

We all love our shirts, even though the joke goes a bit over the boys’ heads 😂 and the quality of the shirts are great and super comfy! I will be ordering more for sure!
Love this small town company and their impeccable wit!

Erica K.

Thank you for the quickly completed order and we are very grateful for your consultation. The consultant who accepted the order explained everything very clearly and in detail. The product is high quality, I ordered it as a gift, the birthday boy is happy. I RECOMMEND!

Inna I.

These shirts are great!
Great artwork, awesome puns.
Customer service is fantastic. Highly recommend.

Michelle S.

Hilarious! Great customer service. Shirts survived many washes!! Helping me break the ice at the bar too with new people.

Amy B.

Great shirts. Love the designs and quality. Made for great gifts also!

Robert M.

If you like beer and cheeky shirts they have some of the best! Quick to respond and great quality products.

Ashley P.

New favourite shirt. Proper soft material, good fit, vibrant label.

Godzilla M.

Hilarious shirts. Great quality. Fast response from owner during communications

Nevin B.

I bought a sign, came fast, I put It up in my mancave. Looks awesome.

Scott M.

Great product and service! Arrived on time and quality is great.

Allen G.

Awesome, hilarious puns. Two thumbs up!

Cesar I.

Hilarious design and great product!

Noel J.

Beautifully Designed, Almost Inappropriate Gear

Hot mess when you drink? That’s fine—our shirts make you look your best when you’re at your worst.

Sexy, funny, and perfectly inappropriate, our beer-inspired clothing is here to keep the laughs flowing and the style effortless.

Grab a Shirt, Crack a Beer, and Join the Coch ‘n Balz Family.

Shop Now

Join Our Enablers Club

Get exclusive deals, previews of sexy new designs, and 10% off your first order. Warning: signing up may cause an increase in unsolicited compliments.